When success breeds contempt: The ancient wisdom your critics hope you never learn

A senior executive I know closed a transaction that saved her company R50 million and secured 200 jobs. Within 48 hours, boardroom whispers began: “She's too aggressive”, “she plays politics” or “lucky timing.”

When excellence cannot be denied, critics pivot to character assassination.

Consider this African proverb: “They found no wrong with the rose, so they complained it has thorns.” Have you heard it?

Do you know what it means? Here is another: “They found no harm in the lotus, so they said it grows in marshy lands.”

How many of us understand what these observations reveal about professional success? These proverbs describe a phenomenon playing out daily in boardrooms and executive suites: when your performance becomes unimpeachable, critics attack everything adjacent—your style, your background, your methods, even your personality.

Not because these are problematic, but because your work cannot be faulted. If you have built something significant or outperformed your peers, you have encountered this. The attacks come disguised as concern, wrapped in constructive feedback, delivered with a smile. But make no mistake—this is about diminishing what others cannot match. What follows examines why this happens, how to navigate it without compromising your trajectory, and how to ensure you never become the person wielding the knife.

Now that you understand these proverbs, let us examine how they manifest in professional life. A fund manager delivers 18% returns over five years. Her portfolio strategy is sound, her risk management impeccable.

Yet critics focus on her “abrasive communication style” and “lack of team spirit”.

The thorns—her directness, her refusal to waste time on consensus for obvious decisions—become the target because her returns cannot be attacked. What they call thorns are necessary boundaries protecting her focus and results.

A CEO who grew up in a township and worked through university via night school takes his company from near bankruptcy to market leadership in three years. Instead of celebration, whispers circulate about his “lack of polish” and whether he “fits the culture”.

His muddy waters—his unconventional background—become the criticism because his turnaround results speak for themselves. The struggles that equipped him with resilience become weapons in the hands of those who inherited their positions.

Consider WeBuyCars' April 2024 JSE listing—a R7.5 billion unbundling that unlocked significant shareholder value. Today's market celebrates the company's independent success and current leadership, yet few remember the Transaction Capital executives who navigated this complex restructuring during turbulent times.

Sahil Samjowan, who served as Group CFO during the critical unbundling phase, now applies his expertise at Standard Bank—another example of a professional adding value elsewhere while the spotlight shines on those currently at the helm.

And these professionals will continue to shine; they do not need the spark created for them, they are the spark in society. Do you see the pattern? When your performance metrics are undeniable, critics pivot to subjective assessments. When your P&L is unassailable, they question your leadership style.

When your client list is enviable, they wonder whether you are “really one of us”. The proverbs are not metaphors. They are operating manuals for navigating environments where excellence threatens mediocrity.

People confronted with excellence they cannot match face psychological discomfort. They have three options: celebrate it, use it as inspiration, or diminish it. Many choose the third because it requires no investment in self-improvement. Attacking your success allows them to maintain their self-image at zero cost.

This stems from insecurity and pain, not malice. Understanding this allows compassion without requiring you to accept the abuse. Distinguish genuine feedback from defensive attacks. Real criticism offers specific, actionable insights. Attacks target characteristics without offering alternatives. Build relationships with people who understand your trajectory. Respond strategically, not emotionally. Cultivate compassion without compromising boundaries or performance standards.

You now recognise the pattern. When you encounter others' success that makes you uncomfortable, pause. Ask yourself: Am I offering genuine insight or simply uncomfortable with their results? Every time you celebrate rather than criticise, you create space for excellence. Every time you honour rather than attack uniqueness, you make merit-based advancement safer. If you have been hurt by unjust criticism, you face a choice: perpetuate the cycle or lift others based on results, not conformity.

The executive I mentioned at the beginning? She chose grace over retaliation. She acknowledged her team, maintained her standards, and continued delivering results. Twelve months later, those critics were silent—not because she convinced them, but because her track record spoke louder. She secured a board position elsewhere. They remain in the same roles. When criticism comes—and it will if you are building anything of value—you face a choice. Internalise it and contract, or recognise it as evidence of impact. But there is a deeper decision: how you behave when you hold power over others' advancement.

Each of us will stand on both sides. We will be judged for our muddy origins, questioned for our square methods, accused of having thorns. But we will also sit in performance reviews and promotion committees deciding how to respond to others' excellence. In those moments, when someone's results make you uncomfortable, when their methods challenge convention—pause.

Ask whether your feedback serves their development or protects your position. Those who build lasting success understand that criticism of their excellence reflects the critic's limitations. They refuse to dim their performance while refusing to become bitter. Having faced unjust criticism, they choose never to wield it themselves. They become executives who value results over pedigree, innovation over tradition.

Your excellence is not an apology you owe. Your unconventional path is not a liability. Your boundaries are not character flaws. These are facts confirmed by every fund manager who delivered returns while being called difficult, every entrepreneur who built empires from humble beginnings. The market rewards results.

Be the executive who delivers. Be the professional who innovates. Be the leader who sets boundaries.

Not someday. Not partially. But fully, starting today. And when you gain influence, remember: the garden grows richer with diverse flowers and unconventional methods. That is how we build organisations where excellence is rewarded regardless of style, where talent advances based on results, where the next generation faces less resistance. That is how we become better leaders—not by being flawless, but by being brave enough to excel and wise enough to celebrate when others do the same.

l Hannuman is a Director at AVIB and an employee benefits consultant who holds an MBA from UKZN, is an FSA of the Financial Planning Institute of South Africa, a Human Values Practitioner, and a Behavioural Life Coach who believes in the betterment of life for all.